MEET THE COMMITTEE
Dr. Leo Serrano
Senior Bio‑Containment Analyst
Responsible for ensuring that hazardous materials remain exactly where they are supposed to be. Has personally rewritten the cryogenic handling protocol six times due to “interpretive liberties” taken by staff. Known for the phrase: “If you have to ask whether it’s safe, it isn’t.”
Marla J. Kettering
Vice President
NPE Liaison
Oversees interdepartmental coordination and the ongoing effort to keep Sub Zero and International Semen Shippers from becoming a case study. Specializes in policy enforcement, procedural refinement, and the art of saying “absolutely not” in a professional tone.
Derrik Halvorsen, RN, CCO
Chief Compliance Officer
A veteran of three industries, seven regulatory bodies, and more preventable incidents than any one person should have to witness. Known for the ability to identify a safety violation from across the building using only tone and intuition. Has a binder for everything, including a binder for binders.
Judy Rourke
Incident Response Coordinator
First on the scene when something goes wrong, which is unfortunately often. Maintains a calm demeanor even when confronted with situations that defy both logic and policy. Has a standing appointment with HR to discuss “coping strategies.”
Andrew Parringson
Molecular Logistics Auditor
Oversees chain‑of‑custody documentation, labeling accuracy, and the ongoing battle against the phrase “miscellaneous sample.” Has a near‑supernatural ability to detect mislabeled containers. Once found a sample stored in a lunchbox and has not emotionally recovered.
